Insights

I've chosen my cell. I know everyone lives in a cage, they just don't see the bars.
(again, hackneyed sayings with no "meaning")

I see the figurative bars, so for me it doesn't really matter that the physical appearance of my life also looks like a cage. I live in a small room. I go to work and back. My ideas are small. Half a million people have already thought my thoughts.

Tonight I had an opportunity to go a friends "dorm" (I am still living the college life!) and share dinner and drink with the students (sorry Andrew). I opted out. Sure, I had problems with my online bank and that spoiled my evening, but it was minor. It was just an excuse to stay home. And write this blog and read The Golden Notebook.

I wrote the above awhile back and only now have an opportunity to finish.

I agree with Anna Wulf. Words can't describe the insights gained in my brain. While I think it, it makes sense, but once I write it down here and read what I have written, it all sounds so trite, absurdly mundane. And writing, the physical mechanics of typing or writing with a pen somehow impedes the free flow of thought, the instantaneous association of ideas. I am losing the original seed for this post already. Let me pause and collect my thoughts again.

I have to retrace my thought process. What was I thinking about and how did I arrive at the association with Anna Wulf?

I can't do it.
The thought is lost.

It is as if by trying to record it, I destroyed it... my brilliantly mundane associative idea. Maybe my Alien friend Brian will have something more insightful to say.

Ah! One thought. Who reads this blog? I've asked this question before, and my secret wish (as most writers have) is for someone to "discover" my musing and take some measure of worth from it. But really! Most of us are too busy with work. I have just enough time to work and write these posts. I don't have time to read other blogs! So in the end the readers who would gain any meaningful insight from my blog are busy working, or they work and post on blogs of their own, and are much to busy to spend hours wading in the cesspool of pseudoblogs, ad-blogs, scam-blogs to find and consistently read my blog anyway.

Yes, I guess I could follow the blog links from one good blog to ones that he/she reads too. But there I would still have to read a LOT of crap (why not read my own crap?). This blog is really being read consistently by two people, and we know who we are.

How much insight are you getting Jester